Vinay Kukutla, Ajinkya Nene, Joy Tang.
Sound the cannon, because today we had a double kill! Yes, we know there were three kills total on this warm, sunny Tuesday in February. But by double kill we mean two back-to-back kills of targets in the same group at the same (ish) location. Though we don't have much in the way of photos or videos, this story more than speaks for itself. So for once, we'll cut the smack talk in the beginning and cut right to the chase. And what a great chase it was.
Today, we'll be focusing not on the targets or the killers, but on someone who we'll simply call “The Backstabber”. We really admire your work and what you were able to accomplish today. Having decided to skip their Linear Algebra class to watch Deadpool instead (a decision which we greatly approve of), Vinay Kukutla was at Baskin Robins with a group of friends. His killer, who was at the Great Mall, was alerted by The Backstabber that Vinay was without a spoons, so he/she sped over to take him out. He/she hid behind a pillar until he came out and sealed the deal. Pretty standard. But praiseworthy, nonetheless. Even Snapchat-worthy, as can be seen in Chetan chilling in the background of this photo.
You'd think that multiple kills hitting people in the same group would be as rare as lightning striking twice. But with The Backstabber around, the odds were not in their favor. About an hour later, when the crew was at Chipotle contracting E. Coli, Ajinkya Nene happened to run into his killer who was going for a job interview at the burrito joint. But since he/she was in an interview, they didn't think much of it. Just as his/her interview ended, the group was about to leave. As stated by the killer, “I tried to casually play it off... But when Ajinkya saw me running towards him he started SPRINTING.”
With a massive burrito sitting in his stomach, he somehow outran him/her and escaped out of sight. So the killer, working with The Backstabber and a still-salty Vinay, hid under a thick blanket in the trunk of their van. Apparently, it caught some attention. Five teenage boys ushering someone into the trunk of their SUV and closing the door. The Backstabber then called Ajinkya to convince him that they had drove off and were going to pick him up and bring him to safety. Somehow, in this amount of time, Ajinkya had run past Prospect High School all the way to the intersection of Miller and Rainbow. Over a mile. With a Chipotle burrito in his stomach. In black jeans and a turtleneck. Talk about a will to survive. But as he climbed into the car from the side of the road and sat in the backseat, the killer crawled out of the trunk and killed him then and there.
Go to school, kids. Or karma will bite you back. And laugh at you. Just like we are right now.
Our hint for Immunity #5 involves our good friend Harry Potter. In the wizarding world of Hogwarts, Quidditch is a pretty big deal. Not only is it a source of spirit and entertainment for the four houses on campus, but it helps multiple characters pull the ladies. All things aside, Quidditch is a team sport. You have the Beaters, the Chasers, the Keepers, and the Seekers, all of whom must work together to achieve success.
Teamwork is of ultimate importance. And this includes things like trust, selflessness, camaraderie, et cetera. All we'll say for now is to beware of teammates who may be like The Backstabber. And beware of Snitches as well. Or don't, get killed, and give us a great story to write about. The choice is all yours. Until then!